How the smurf did this film make over half a billion dollars!? I mean, the makers of this movie stole the plot from the 2007 Disney film 'Enchanted' and that only made $340 million at the box office. I know that 'Enchanted' was mostly aimed at females but THIS to make over $500 million!? How the smurf does that work out!? 'Enchanted' was a way better film by my standards and I absolutely love that film! This does not even come close to 'Enchanted' in my books! Why do all of the crap films have to make the most money?
Ok, first up, I just have to mention..why is there phallic symbolism in the poster!? (If you don't know what that is, google it) This is a CHILDREN'S film! Why do the designers have to add that in! I mean, sex won't exactly sell for a movie like this..Unless someone has a fetish for little blue people which I highly doubt. But, maybe its linked to the film? I mean, there were enough double entendres in this... I have always wondered that about children films? Why do they have to have double entrendres in them? Maybe so they can get a chuckle out the adults in the audience? I mean, in certain films like the Brady Bunch films, it's ok because that's part of the humor. But in this type of film..It just makes it sound crude. Speaking of humor, I did not laugh at one joke in this film! Not one! Basically because I was frustrated throughout the whole film. The acting, the jokes, the plot, the CGI, the whole thing was enough to make someone go crazy! I know some of the adults that were watching the film were going to go crazy when they would go home. There is this one song that the Smurf characters sing over and over and over and even one of the characters tells them to shut up so they start humming it. When I left the theater (The screening I went to was sold out by the way) mostly all of the children were singing or humming that godforsaken tune! My 7 year old cousin was one of them..In the car ride home, that all we could here..That's enough to drive me nuts! It's like Alvin And The Chipmunks all over again..Now, I could start talking about how this film compares with Alvin and that the film was made because Alvin was so successful..But..I can save that for another time. I have a lot of complaints about this film so I don't want to make this too long.
Ok, the first thing I noticed about this film is the pacing. When the film starts, everything happens so fast that it seems VERY rushed. And there is NO character development. There is no time to learn each of the characters names and before you know it, they are already in New York and having fun admiring all of the product placement. And then, at certain scenes, they can drag on for SOO long and be SOO slow! I would have preferred the slow scenes at the start of the film so I can feel for the characters and start caring about them. And then I would have preferred to have the fast scenes in the middle of the film where it really starts to lag. Even though I very highly doubt that I could ever feel for blue people. Didn't feel for them in Avatar, didn't feel for them in this.
Next thing is the acting/voice acting.OMG, Why can't I ever find a movie were people can actually act! Some of the other reviews say that Neil Patrick Harris was the best thing about this movie. I couldn't stand him in this! He has so lifeless and boring to watch! There were scenes where him and the female lead talk about their newborn baby and all of that. You could so tell that he didn't care. I know he is gay and all so maybe that's his excuse. I don't know if he grew up with Smurfs and wanted to be part of the reboot. Or if he just wanted a huge ass pay check. Either way..horrible job. Ok, Hank Azaria played the evil wizard Gargamon(I think that's his name) and he played his role fine. He wasn't given that much to start off with. He plays his role over the top and you can tell that he is having a good time with it. Even though the script was a bit weak and he had to deliver some really unfunny jokes. But when we got to the third act, you can tell that he really hates these smurfs and that he will do anything to kill them. It's so much fun to watch when he gets his magic wand and starts going ballistic with it. He starts firing magic everywhere and you can tell that he is really having fun with it. So I praise him for his performance in this role. The voice acting in this...I didn't really like..The main Papa Smurf..I REALLY didn't like. He spoke in a monotone through out the whole film and it really peeved me off! Like in moments when the smurfs were in danger, he spoke in the same slow, monotone voice and it just didn't seem like he cared that his sons and one daughter were in danger. Katy Perry..she's fine in this.. except when she is singing and making numerous references to herself.."I kissed a smurf and I liked it" for example..
Ok..Humor..Like I said..I didn't find anything in this film funny! The humor in this is basically just taking a normal saying and replacing the main word with smurf. For example "Why the smurf would you do that?" With nearly sentence that the smurfs say, the writers tried to put smurf into it. I don't get why they had to do this? Maybe it was in the original TV series but still, why would they do that! Trust me! It does get on your nerves after in a while. Also, they add some jokes deliberately into the script! For example, there is a scene where the main character gets into a taxi and Gargamel runs behind it, trying to catch up to him because the smurfs are in the cab. Patrick(Neil Patrick Harris's charcter. I know, real original character name right?) says that he forgets his cell phone and the taxi brakes hard. Garagamel catches up to the taxi when it brakes and smashes right into the back of it. Right when that happens, Patrick finds his cell phone in his bag and the cab driver resumes driving. What was the point of that scene!!?? For some laughs from the children, of course! Pathetic, if you have to add those kind of scenes just for laughs. Shows that you have crap screenwriters. There is also this one scene where the smurfs and Patrick play a song on the video game Rock Band. It goes o for like 5 minutes! I hate these type of culture reference scenes! I mean, they even have one of the smurfs play on the drums like the rabbit in the film Hop(Which wasn't a much better film, I might add) There was no point to it and...you guessed it..It wasn't funny.
My last nit pick that I have is the CGI. There is this cat(Can't remember his name) which is Gargamel's sidekick. With some shots, he is CG and some he is a real cat. The CG on this character is HORRIBLE!! He looks so cartoony and...not real. Here, let me show you.
Now my one good thing I have to say about this is the 3D. Like I have said before, I am a huge fan of 3D. When it is used correctly, It can be such a pleasure to see and a delight for the eyes. When used poorly, it can be hard to see and it can look just like a 2D movie. This film..had a mixture of both. Some scene looked like a normal 2D movie and some were really eye popping. With scenes with the characters just talking, it looked like a 2D but the finale was awesome! Gargamel kept on firing his magic at the screen while he was capturing the smurfs and there they were. Dangling in front of our eyes. Also he was blowing heaps of crap up and most of it was flying all over the place :D
So yeah..again..I really hated this film. Man, I can't find a good film to watch! The story was copied, the script was weak, the jokes were unfunny and the acting was horrible!
I think if you want to entertain the children for 2 hours then pop this in front of them and they will surly be entertained.(Just beware that there are some scenes where is only talk about about babies and work promotions, all that kind of stuff and no smurfs are present in these scenes) But if you are a teenager like me and want a good movie, I suggest you see Abduction, The Help or Friends With Benefits.
Watch the trailer down below:
2 out of 5 stars for me :/
Haha, very professional review. Lots of good critiquing. I can't believe you saw this... just cos you don't have to pay doesn't mean you should go. The whole weak plot, replacing words with "smurf" and bad acting... I couldn't stand it. Spy Kids 4 must be better than this! If you want a film where people can act, avoid the commercial crap, unless its a blockbuster NOT aimed at kids or specifically teens, because those are usually very disappointing, or just full of people who "look good" but can't act.
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